Women are beautiful, better, and stronger together

During my time climbing the corporate ladder, I had my fair share of run-ins with other women who were catty, judgmental and two-faced. At least that’s how I viewed them a few years ago, when I was vying for a promotion in the company I worked for.

I remember hearing back from co-workers that a particular person was running my name through the dirt and sharing with others how unfit I was for the promotion. The crazy part is that this person was in fact someone who I had a lot of respect for and considered a friend at the time.

Despite it all, I got the promotion and still continued to be cordial with that woman for several years after.

The truth is–most women don’t support other women. And it pains me to recognize that I’ve fallen victim to this as well in my own life experiences.

Women are catty to each other. Women talk behind each other’s backs. Women are two-faced.

At least that’s what I thought up until the beginning of this year when I embarked on my journey with A Musing Momma.

You see, there is a movement of women empowerment out there striving to break the cycle of women versus women mentalities. We as women are magnificent and powerful, however we’re more powerful when we are working together.

There are two trending hashtags that I came across earlier this year– #communityovercompetition and #womensupportingwomen. To me, these phrases mean so much more to me than a trendy slogan you could put in the caption of your photo.

For me, community over competition is exactly what I envisioned when I set out to make connections with other mommas with A Musing Momma.

I strongly believe that there is enough success in the world to go around. That one person’s success doesn’t mean there is less for you. The possibilities are truly endless, and it makes sense for us women to lock arms and help each other up.

Women supporting other women is beautiful. It shows the confidence you have in your abilities to be the best version of yourself that you can be.

When I see women bashing other women, it’s more of a reflection of them than anything else. These women are battling things that no one can see, and they are projecting fears and insecurities out on others to make them feel more powerful.

Change is on the horizon. Women are waking up to the fact that we are better, stronger and more beautiful together.

Credit: Nikki Boether @charlietakesphx

Cheer on that momma who just breastfed her child for the first time. Give a high-five to the woman who is slaying in her career. Recognize that momma who is balancing everything so well from what you can see. When we can support and encourage each other, we empower one another.


What does community over competition OR women supporting women mean to YOU? Share some thoughts below! Follow and TAG @amusingmomma in any thoughts you have related to this post and share this with a friend today!

“Find your tribe, love them hard”

Somewhere in the world, there is a woman who is conflicted in the friendships she keeps. She enjoys the friendships she maintains, but still isn’t fulfilled. She wants more than the typical “what are your plans for the weekend” chat and is longing for something deeper. She wants more than the surface-level acquaintance-type-of-friendship. She wants her tribe…


Your tribe. Your people. The ones who are in your corner to cheer you on, support you and uplift you. A tribe can be defined as “a group of persons having a common character, occupation, or interest” * In other words, your tribe is your community and your support system.

As human beings, we are meant to connect. We are emotional beings who thrive off of connection and support. It makes sense to want this close-knit community of support.

I’m a strong believer of surrounding yourself around like-minded people in order to build your tribe. After all, sharing common interests is one way that connections are made.

Attracting your tribe is a vital piece to success and happiness. Behind every successful person is a strong and selective group of people who are their biggest supporters and loudest cheerleaders. When you’ve got a strong support system in place, you get the encouragement and motivation you need to reach for your biggest dreams.

Your tribe fuels your energies and passions. Remember, they are your loudest cheerleaders. So, when you’ve hit a wall of discouragement or demotivation, these cheerleaders will help you get back off the ground and stand taller than you were before.

Surrounding yourself around a group of driven and inspired individuals also ensures that you are playing the game with your best, most intense effort. You are challenged, and inspired, and motivated to achieve greatness because you all are focused on being your best.

I was listening to a favorite podcast of mine (The Influencer Podcast), and the guest on the show talked about the concept of scarcity versus abundance. To summarize the concept, scarcity is the thought that success is limited, and only the select few will be able to achieve success. However, abundance is the belief that there is unlimited amount of success in the world and anyone who is hungry enough for success can and will achieve it.  I believe in the latter.

There is enough room in this world for all of us to be successful, and my tribe knows and understands this very well.

I reconnected the other night with an old high school friend. We spent two hours in a deep conversation about our journey, motherhood and our dreams for our career. My soul needed that kind of connection. To have another momma share her story and journey through motherhood and the realization that I wasn’t alone in this… I now consider her a part of my tribe.

Mommas, find your tribe. Find those cheerleaders and supporters. Find those people who will be in your corner throughout every stage of your journey—whatever journey you are on. Be selective in your tribe, and when you’ve found your perfect tribe, as the saying goes—”love them hard”.

Related: Friendships are like Chapter Books

*Source: merriam-webster.com/dictionary/tribe


Think of a goal you have or an achievement you are pursuing…Who do you tell first? Who tries to give you excuses for why you CAN’T? Who shares your excitement? Who shows up? Who doesn’t? Who is truly happy for you? Answer these questions to narrow down on your support-system, your tribe. Who is YOUR tribe made up of? Share in the comments below!

If you liked this post, please share with a friend or fellow momma.

Also, join ME on IG Live every Saturday morning at 10:00 am PT/AZ for a virtual coffee date where we can chat more about this and other topics. Hope to see you there! You can access my IG feed HERE.

Negative Self-Talk and Comparison…

If I listened to every negative thought that crossed my mind on a daily basis, I would never get any closer to following my dreams and passions. Cliché, I know—but so very true. Today’s post is about the negative self-talk that we as mommas do to ourselves daily.

Here’s an example. Scrolling through your social media feeds, what thoughts are crossing your mind as you see another momma’s selfie or “picture perfect” life she seems to have? If it’s not a positive thought, then where does that negativity come from?  Comparison is going to prevent us from making progress in our world today. To be upfront with you—I find myself struggling with comparison as well. It’s something we all do.

Negative self-talk, self-doubt, and insecurities can flood our thoughts and it can be very dangerous. It will prevent us from following our dreams, testing an idea, or exploring different things on a journey to purpose and fulfillment.

A more personal example: When asked about my Master’s degree I am currently pursuing, I will minimize it by mentioning that I did the majority of it online (almost as if saying that it was too easy to do).  When I speak up during a meeting, I find myself apologizing for my thoughts. Or, even as I am working on this blog, I sometimes question whether or not I am even making a difference. The conversations my mind is having with me is one that compares my journey to others. Comparison and negative self-talk.

Why do we all feel the need to minimize our greatness? Imagine a world where we all KNEW from every fiber of our being, just how VALUABLE we are. How much more light would shine on our world? How much more happiness and fulfillment might we have and embrace?

Instead of comparing ourselves with others, we could uplift and encourage. Think about how much more comfortable we’d be with taking risks without the fear of rejection, failure or ridicule.

It all starts with our thoughts. Our thoughts are powerful and our thoughts can propel us to our greatness. Today I will start on my first step of eliminating that comparison and negative self-talk. I’m going to be conscious of my thoughts and catch myself in the middle of a negative conversation my mind might want me to have.

I’ll catch those negative conversations and infuse positivity. Turn “I can’t do THAT” to “How can I achieve that?” Change “I’m not as good as…” to “I’m THE best version of myself, and here’s why…”  


What are some tips and tricks of how you CATCH your negative self-talk? How do you keep yourself from the monster of comparison? Share in the comments below!

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Successful people do Vision Boards

If your reading this, can you clearly define your vision? Can you perfectly see your future laid out and if so, are you taking the necessary steps to get to that ultimate goal? For many successful people, a clear vision helps define goals and attracts people to follow after the leader’s footsteps. Of course, that’s what you’d read about in the books. But, how does this apply to happiness and fulfillment? I’ll ask one more question– how do you know where you’re going without having the vision for it?

If you’re like me, then you started off this year with great intentions and may have even set your goals out on paper (or a blog post like I did here). Still, as we end January 2018—I’m still left with the itch to do more defining of my vision.

Allow me to introduce a friend, Tanya @GlowStudioAZ. Tanya is an accomplished speaker, author and executive coach who recently launched her second business venture specializing in wellness classes, meditation, yoga and journaling classes here in Phoenix, AZ. It was Tanya’s vision board workshop that caught my attention on Instagram in early January.

The Workshop

The workshop began with a powerful visualization practice in which Tanya asked us to close our eyes and visualize our ideal day from the moment we wake up, to the moment we close our eyes. For 10 minutes, we all sat in silence as Tanya guided us through a meditation that helped bring our true thoughts and dreams into clear vision.

After the guided visualization, we were tasked at journaling thoughts and themes that emerged through the meditation practice. For another 10 minutes, I wrote nonstop—anything that came to my mind and the words that resonated with me.

The themes I was able to uncover? Organization, Time, Freedom, and Strengthening actions. Centered around everything that I do, is the little family my husband and I have created. It was amazing to see my vision for intention and purpose brought to fruition in the pictures and words that I was able to capture on my vision board.

Now what?

My vision board is prominently displayed in an area where I see it first thing in the morning. I wake up, and while I’m getting ready for the day—I can see my vision board as a reminder of what my vision is. There is power in SEEING my dreams glued out in an organized-chaos cardboard display.

I’m no multi-million-dollar business owner, and I don’t have thousands of “followers,” but I know that all successful people start with a vision and work towards that vision every day. This vision board is one way I will work towards my vision of being happy, FREE and fulfilled.

If YOU are in the Phoenix area and would like to find out more about Glow Studio AZ, check out Tanya– @GlowstudioAZ, @Tanyawheeless @myhappygrace . www.theglowlife.com for more information—She’s got a few more February workshops including a Happy Hustle Mastermind, Glow Micro-Retreat and Vision Board Workshop, filling up fast!

What is YOUR vision, and how do YOU make it come to life? Share some ideas and thoughts in the comments below!

Lessons in Leadership. Take your leadership to the next level

 

When I think back on my journey to where I’m at today in my career, there is one thing that has been consistent—Leadership.

Clark Tibbs

I’ve had the privilege of working for some great leaders who have also become mentors to me. Reflecting on each manager who I’ve reported to, there are certain things that have really left a mark and shaped me into the leader I am today.

There’s Stella* who took a chance on me. I was a wide-eyed go-getter who had virtually no experience with cash handling or customer service, but still she saw something in me. What Stella taught me was discipline and process help to make your life an easier one. She was processed and had high standards. I will always remember the first time she had a talk with me about my poor performance. It was the only time she needed to have that discussion, because after that—I became her top performer.

There was Jessica* who taught me to go after what I want in life. I thought becoming a banker was out of my reach, but Jessica believed in me (before I even knew I had it in myself). Jessica taught me to look for what I want in life, and go all in—leaving the fear of failure behind. Because of Jessica, I’ve sought after other roles with the same enthusiasm I learned from her.

I’ll never forget the time I had working with Joe.* What I learned from Joe is priceless and applies to all aspects of my life, professionally and personally. Joe taught me what it means to be a leader who serves. He had a way to inspire people to become something bigger than themselves. I envied how Joe captured the room with just one phrase. He believed that if I wanted to move mountains, I would be able to do that. His authentic, REAL belief in me inspired me to step outside my comfort zone often and grow as a leader.

I had the pleasure to learn from John,* who is the ultimate dream chaser. He helped me understand that dreams are worth chasing. No matter what challenges get in your way (declines, lack of money, lack of perceived results, etc)—your dream is worth fighting for. John has since left the corporate world in pursuance of his lifelong dream and it’s fantastic to see him live out his dream today!

I’ve learned from Becky* as I refine my skills and development every day. Becky taught me the importance of focusing on self-development. I’ve learned that there’s always something to improve on in your current role, no matter the tenure you have.

You don’t ever know what type of impression you’ll leave on somebody, but it’s worth considering. What impression will YOU leave on people? As a leader, you have the unique opportunity to influence and inspire people. Here are some things you can do TODAY to evoke that inspiration:

  • Look for potential in individuals, and don’t be afraid to take a chance on them.
  • Believing wholeheartedly in them. Not just the “I believe you can do it,” kind of belief, but really believing the BEST of people.
  • Inspiring people to be a part of something bigger than themselves. Seek their opinions. Challenge their mindsets. Serve them. When you’ve got a team who is fully committed, the sky is the limit with what you can do from there!
  • Encourage them to find their dream and chase after it. Get to know their dreams, their passions. Encourage them to find passion in what they do every day!

*Names used with permission or changed to protect the privacy of the individual

What were some of the leadership lessons you’ve learned from past leaders? Does it shape you into the type of person/leader you are today? Share below in the comments!

Searching for your WHY- How to find your purpose

 

It started with a single one word question—“Why?”

Pre-child, 25 years old and a manager in a corporate setting.  It was 2011 and I was asked this question in a meeting by my boss at the time.

“What’s your Why?” He challenged us to find our why with the idea that “If your why doesn’t make you cry….find another why.”

It was the first time I heard the “Why” concept and I was intrigued. My why?…What was my Why? How do I find my Why? And—How does that relate to what I’m doing here….in a Corporate setting?

I’m a rules-follower, list-checker type of person… so of course my natural instinct was to explore more of what this Why was and how I could find one. I read books like this one, or this one.  Listened to TED talks. Even journaled a bit in search of what my Why was.

Was it my Husband? My family? Myself? I was on a search of finding something I could call my Why.

Finding my Why required much more than text book reading and hours of watching TED talks. Because, when my boss was asking us for our Why….what he was really asking us to do, is to search for our purpose.

Why do I work as hard as I do? What drives me? What keeps me motivated? What is my purpose?

What I’ve learned over the years is that your purpose—your WHY— requires a lifelong pursuit of intention. Being intentional in what you do with your purpose (and WHY) in mind.

It’s a simple question to consider—What is your Why? Because your Why will compel you to work harder, fight for what you want and have the endurance to tackle all of the challenges that life throws your way.

I’ll have to share my personal story of my WHY at a later time. But, for you…here are some tips and advice on what you can do to get closer to identifying your Why.

Imagine your life exactly how you want it—WHO is there? For many people, their Why is a person (or people) who are their biggest support system. When you’ve identified WHO you are working so hard for, it’s easier to keep that in mind as you face challenges on your pathway to your ideal future.

Speaking of which, what is your ideal future? Think of what you are striving for in life….is it happiness? Close relationships and friendships? Is it success? Consider those questions and reflect on what your ideal future looks like. WRITE IT DOWN. Writing down your ideal future will put you one step closer to actually achieving it.

Think of your legacy. What do you want to be known for? Spend some time reflecting on the legacy you want to leave behind when you leave this Earth. When you’ve defined how you want to be remembered, your daily actions become much more purposeful.

 

 

It’s a great time to begin reflecting and narrowing down what your WHY and TRUE purpose is. I challenge YOU to start defining your WHY.

What is YOUR WHY? I’d love to hear from you– Share in the comments below.

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