EP51: Learning to be OK with failed expectations in motherhood w/Ashurina Ream
From tragedy to triumph, licensed clinical psychologist and certified perinatal mental health provider Ashurina Ream has had her share of experiences on her journey to motherhood. After enduring two miscarriages, Ashurina gave birth to a healthy baby boy which lead to her passion around helping mothers with education and resources in maternal mental health awareness.
Listen in this week as Candice and Ashurina chat about miscarriage, maternal anxiety, expectations in motherhood and all things in between. This episode will leave you with tips and resources you can lean on if you find yourself challenged in motherhood.
EP39: Achieving harmony in #momlife and the naptime hustle w/ Ashley Richards
You’ve heard about work life balance, work/life alignment… but how about work life harmony? It’s true, in motherhood finding that harmony in your work and home life is not always easy. Ashley Richards has found the harmony in her motherhood as a successful business owner and mompreneur.
Candice and Ashley chat about finding harmony in your #momlife and the naptime hustle– a time where Ashley encourages work-from-home-moms to pursue their passions while the children are down for naps. You can pursue your career goals while being a mom fulltime, and Ashley wants to encourage moms all over with this conversation.
During my time climbing the corporate ladder, I had my fair share of run-ins with other women who were catty, judgmental and two-faced. At least that’s how I viewed them a few years ago, when I was vying for a promotion in the company I worked for.
I remember hearing back from co-workers that a particular person was running my name through the dirt and sharing with others how unfit I was for the promotion. The crazy part is that this person was in fact someone who I had a lot of respect for and considered a friend at the time.
Despite it all, I got the promotion and still continued to be cordial with that woman for several years after.
The truth is–most women don’t support other women. And it pains me to recognize that I’ve fallen victim to this as well in my own life experiences.
Women are catty to each other. Women talk behind each other’s backs. Women are two-faced.
At least that’s what I thought up until the beginning of this year when I embarked on my journey with A Musing Momma.
You see, there is a movement of women empowerment out there striving to break the cycle of women versus women mentalities. We as women are magnificent and powerful, however we’re more powerful when we are working together.
There are two trending hashtags that I came across earlier this year– #communityovercompetition and #womensupportingwomen. To me, these phrases mean so much more to me than a trendy slogan you could put in the caption of your photo.
For me, community over competition is exactly what I envisioned when I set out to make connections with other mommas with A Musing Momma.
I strongly believe that there is enough success in the world to go around. That one person’s success doesn’t mean there is less for you. The possibilities are truly endless, and it makes sense for us women to lock arms and help each other up.
Women supporting other women is beautiful. It shows the confidence you have in your abilities to be the best version of yourself that you can be.
When I see women bashing other women, it’s more of a reflection of them than anything else. These women are battling things that no one can see, and they are projecting fears and insecurities out on others to make them feel more powerful.
Change is on the horizon. Women are waking up to the fact that we are better, stronger and more beautiful together.
Cheer on that momma who just breastfed her child for the first time. Give a high-five to the woman who is slaying in her career. Recognize that momma who is balancing everything so well from what you can see. When we can support and encourage each other, we empower one another.
What does community over competition OR women supporting women mean to YOU? Share some thoughts below! Follow and TAG @amusingmomma in any thoughts you have related to this post and share this with a friend today!
It’s a little after 4:30 on a Wednesday morning, and while the rest of us are sleeping comfortably in our beds, she is heading into a lake to swim and train for the next few hours. Never mind the fact that she just overcame a panic attack minutes before her first few swim strokes. She is focused and committed to preparing her body and mind for the biggest and most intense athletic competition she has ever done.
It’s been a year since she started training and completed her first half Ironman triathlon, and now Breann Meyer has begun round two of her training as she journeys toward completing a full Ironman competition.
You might be curious to find out just HOW and WHY she stays committed…. Spoiler alert: It’s her passion.
How would you define passion?
Passion clearly is the driving force behind Breann’s motivation for what she does when she trains for and completes the Ironman competitions. Breann describes passion as something that “energizes everything in your being.” When training for the Ironman half triathlon, Breann discovered that passion is a requirement for the sport. There are mental and physical challenges that one cannot get through without that clear passion.
“[Passion is] something in you that just makes you have that much love, that much feeling, that much drive and force inside of you….that it just makes you continue on doing what you’re doing.”
At what point did you realize that you were passionate for the sport?
Breann originally thought to herself, “I could never do that.” Having run a few smaller marathons here and there, Breann never really had her sights set on the official Ironman Triathlon. However, one day a work friend challenged her with the possibility of doing the competition. “I threw out all excuses when Jake approached me and I said, I’ve never done a triathlon, I don’t have a bike….” But the undiscovered passion deep inside Breann gave her the courage to take action.
It was October 2017 when Breann completed her first half Ironman triathlon, and the possibility of a full Ironman triathlon became even more of a reality. “When I woke up there after the half, and I was just laying there- like “I’m not sore at all…and if I just do this on my training and change this on my training…I’m gonna make it through the full…I’m gonna do even better and I’ll be able to finish the full”
She goes on to say “…after you’ve been through it, it gives you that passion to get out there and do it…if you felt the way you felt and you want to beat this time—that give you the passion to go out and push even harder, and train even harder, and run more miles and don’t give up and just keep going…”
Of course, there were some challenges that got in the way of Breann pursuing her passion. For instance, not being a morning person and having to wake up between 4:30 and 5 in the morning to train when the rest of the world was still sleeping. Additionally, having a family and balancing it all out. Breann attributes a lot of her success to the support of her husband, Matt, who helped take care of their 6-year-old daughter while Breann was away to train.
Then, there were the mental and physical challenges. “Having mental and physical breakdowns and trying to recoup from that to overcome it and push forward, and knowing that you can do it and go out there the next day to do your swim…[was a huge challenge].”
During the training process for the half, Breann suffered from knee problems that made it even more difficult to push through. She spent time in physical therapy and had to have her knee wrapped in order to compete in the competition.
It’s no secret that there were also mental challenges that Breann had to overcome. A fear of the lake was one of them.
“It’s crazy because your body can handle more than what your mind thinks you can…your mind goes against you constantly…”
An anxiety over swimming in the lake posed a problem for Breann while training, and she had to face her fears as she succumbed to panic attacks and mental breakdowns while preparing for the Ironman competition. So, while Breann was training her body physically for the triathlon, she was also training her MIND to ignore the doubt and anxiety that came with certain aspects of the competition.
“I had to get past my excuses [and challenges] for why I can’t do it…once I got past that, I was like—I can do this….I WANT to do this!”
“I went from ‘I will never do this again—no way—not a chance—this is not happening’—to waking up the next day, and being like, ‘I’m doing a full…I want to do this, I can do this’…and that’s just the passion in that”
Breann’s biggest support is her family and specifically her husband. Additionally, Breann surrounded herself around a support system of friends and peers who were on the same journey as her—training for the Ironman competition. “Going into something you’re not comfortable with, something you don’t know anything about…having the support of Jake to help me—how to change a tire if I get a flat and show me that, ‘cause I would have no idea…but having that support made it that much easier to help me out.”
She also found support in her family and friends during the competition when things got physically and mentally tough for her. “When you run past friends and family…it pushes you… but that just helps you because your mind is over it…your body is over it. But, when they cheer you on, it’s 5 seconds…but those 5 seconds means the world and it makes you feel like ‘alright, If I make it through the next 6 miles, I’ll get to see them again,’ you know…and that pushes you even more…that was a big support.”
Why do you compete in Ironman competitions?
At first response, Breann’s answer was “for myself, accomplishment, to challenge myself.” However, when reflecting on WHY she really does it, her answer landed on her daughter Maddie. “..You know you want to be a role model, right? So, whether it be school that you finish…this is also something big [that I’m doing] for her to see…she sees my dedication and sees my hard work and then she sees me finish…and she can see an outcome to all of that.”
Breann said it best—
“Your body can handle more than what your mind thinks you can.”
Pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone and winning the battle over your inner voice’s negativity and doubt. It takes drive, intention and passion to really go after your dreams…whatever they are. When it comes to getting started in a physical feat like a triathlon, Breann has figured it out. Your body is stronger than you think…ask Breann.
About Breann Meyer
Breann Meyer is a Phoenix-born and raised working momma in the Banking corporate world. She has a 6-year-old daughter, Maddie with her husband and reside in northwest Phoenix. She is an avid photographer who loves being creative and expressive during any down time. During her downtime and when not training, Breann spends time with family, taking Maddie to her extracurricular activities and being an awesome friend! You can follow her on Instagram @bresimjourney or her YouTube channel HERE.
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If your reading this, can you clearly define your vision? Can you perfectly see your future laid out and if so, are you taking the necessary steps to get to that ultimate goal? For many successful people, a clear vision helps define goals and attracts people to follow after the leader’s footsteps. Of course, that’s what you’d read about in the books. But, how does this apply to happiness and fulfillment? I’ll ask one more question– how do you know where you’re going without having the vision for it?
If you’re like me, then you started off this year with great intentions and may have even set your goals out on paper (or a blog post like I did here). Still, as we end January 2018—I’m still left with the itch to do more defining of my vision.
Allow me to introduce a friend, Tanya @GlowStudioAZ. Tanya is an accomplished speaker, author and executive coach who recently launched her second business venture specializing in wellness classes, meditation, yoga and journaling classes here in Phoenix, AZ. It was Tanya’s vision board workshop that caught my attention on Instagram in early January.
The workshop began with a powerful visualization practice in which Tanya asked us to close our eyes and visualize our ideal day from the moment we wake up, to the moment we close our eyes. For 10 minutes, we all sat in silence as Tanya guided us through a meditation that helped bring our true thoughts and dreams into clear vision.
After the guided visualization, we were tasked at journaling thoughts and themes that emerged through the meditation practice. For another 10 minutes, I wrote nonstop—anything that came to my mind and the words that resonated with me.
The themes I was able to uncover? Organization, Time, Freedom, and Strengthening actions. Centered around everything that I do, is the little family my husband and I have created. It was amazing to see my vision for intention and purpose brought to fruition in the pictures and words that I was able to capture on my vision board.
My vision board is prominently displayed in an area where I see it first thing in the morning. I wake up, and while I’m getting ready for the day—I can see my vision board as a reminder of what my vision is. There is power in SEEING my dreams glued out in an organized-chaos cardboard display.
I’m no multi-million-dollar business owner, and I don’t have thousands of “followers,” but I know that all successful people start with a vision and work towards that vision every day. This vision board is one way I will work towards my vision of being happy, FREE and fulfilled.
If YOU are in the Phoenix area and would like to find out more about Glow Studio AZ, check out Tanya– @GlowstudioAZ,@Tanyawheeless@myhappygrace . www.theglowlife.com for more information—She’s got a few more February workshops including a Happy Hustle Mastermind, Glow Micro-Retreat and Vision Board Workshop, filling up fast!
What is YOUR vision, and how do YOU make it come to life? Share some ideas and thoughts in the comments below!
Is there a clear message around WHY you should follow and read?
Since I haven’t formally made my intentions clear, allow me to explain…
It is my intention to share authentic, real things with you in the hopes of inspiring you. A wife and momma first, an influencer second—my goal is to inspire and connect people from all kinds of industries, businesses, and communities.
I want give a space for creativity and collaboration. We’ve all got thoughts and ideas in our minds…Let this be our space….I’ll start the conversation, and you’re encouraged to participate in the dialogue. Your voice matters. This is the space for your voice to be heard. I want to give an outlet for other working moms and dads to promote themselves, find support and just be able to connect with other like-minded individuals.
I remember as a new working mom, I found solace in the community of other working moms via social media groups and parenting blogs. It is my hope that this becomes your place to connect and not feel so alone.
Because, let’s be honest….sometimes life puts you through some crazy things and you are left to think: “Is it just me? Am I the only one who is struggling with this? Everyone else has it all figured out.”
My friends, they don’t. No one has it all figured out, and this blog is meant to pull back the curtain to expose the realness of life as a working parent.
It occurred to me the other day that I haven’t clearly laid out my intentions of this project. Rather, what’s in it for you? So, to summarize: